Because I Simply Do...

[Nichole D.]

I've come to a realization about a lot of things in my life...

What I've Wanted:

I wanted to be a "better Christian" and live a "spirit-filled" life...

I wanted to live an excellent life and receive the blessings from God by living so...

I wanted to "win" many people to the Lord and see them come to church...

I wanted to read my Bible and pray ever day so I can grow, grow, grow...

I wanted to be in church every time the doors were open so I can be known as faithful.


I wanted good things, but I was in it for me... It was all a selfish Christian lifestyle that I was living. I wanted to better myself to get good with God and look good to others who were watching me.

What I've Realized:

I realized that I had it all wrong. It was all self-centered and individual thinking... It really was "all about me" and nothing to do with Christ or others. I've treated God as a mere box off my checklist of "things to do"- Struggling with "doing devotions" instead of simply being devoted, dragging my Baptist butt to church every time the Baptist doors were open 'cuz it's the Baptist thing to do .. (um, wow... I never knew "baptist" could be used as a swear. =/ )

With the messages that God has laid on Erik's heart to preach and with other things that I've been hearing and reading, I've come to that realization... slowly. At times I even denied the thought that all these good things I've desired were for purely selfish reasons...

So God broke me... and is still breaking me, yet making me at the same time. Stepping aside from the spiritual "It's All About Me" mentality, over the last year and a half the Holy Spirit has been opening my eyes to what really is-- in regards to His Word, people, situations... you name it... He's been changing me... and still is...

I got fet up... disgusted... Enough with the selfish Christianity where I'm in it for me. Enough with the self righteous state I struggled to live in. I asked the Holy Spirit to change my heart, cleanse it... and put with in me a new way of thinking as I seek His word with a right attitude, with a pure motive and a pure love...

What the Real Reason Is Now:

Strive for excellence?? YES... I want to strive for excellence- because I love God and want to please HIM... NOT just so I can be a "better Christian" or live a "spirit-filled" life...

Read God's Word? YES... I want to read God's Word because I simply do... Not to say "I read my Bible today... THREE chapters!" and mark it off my spiritual checklist of things to do. I just simply want to read it so I can hear from His heart and mind and see how He has moved in the lives of those from Biblical history and how He still moves today.

Pray Every Day? YES... I want to pray every day... every moment in my heart and mind... because I simply do. I simply want to be in God's presence- to be with Him, to talk to Him, to hear from Him; not to only voice my complaints when I'm having a bad day but to see His goodness. I not only want to share mine or others burdens and petitions, but share with Him my joys and love for Him... and thank Him for His eternal goodness and faithfulness... I don't want to pray to say I prayed an hour. I want to talk with Him in all honesty and integrity- bear who I really am... and love Him for Who He really is- by what His Word says, not what others say.

Serve others? YES... I want to serve others because I simply do. Not to "get them in the church doors" nd increase in number, but to simply love them as Christ loved them- not for personal gain, but for the gain of the kingdom of Christ.

My Changed Heart:

I want to live an excellent life not to be blessed, but to bless my God because... I love Him... I simply do.

Psalm 119:1,29,30
Psalm 139:23-24